I am 39 years old, and I'm embarrassed to say my relationship with my body and understanding of my cycle has only really developed over the last three years. It’s crazy when I think that I have been on some form of contraception since I was 14 years old, but I never fully learned how to monitor my cycle and understand my hormones – what it all means. Adding to this, I carried a lot of shame and discomfort when it came to even thinking about my period, let alone talking about it with anyone.
So, around 2020/2021, when my body, my skin, and my mind started “acting up,” I didn’t know what to think or who to talk to. All I knew was that all of a sudden I couldn’t sleep more than 3-4 hours a night, and I couldn’t switch my mind off, worrying about everything or trying to remember my next-door neighbor's name at 3:30 a.m.! (It was Rob, by the way.)
Over the next few years, I became more and more anxious. I gained weight even though I have always exercised regularly, and my diet has always been good. My cycle became out of whack – sometimes lasting 21 days, then 11 days, then up to 28 days. But my greatest concern was my memory and the brain fog – I was forgetting names, conversations, and simple words to the point I thought I was heading toward early dementia (which runs in my family) or that maybe I had had a small stroke.
I raised some of these concerns with my doctor around June 2023 but was told I was too young for perimenopause (I was 38 at the time) and was told to “just monitor it” for the next 12 months.
2024 has been a tough year, with my confidence all but gone, extreme moods, and feeling rather anti-social, affecting my work and my personal life, with most of those symptoms disappearing as soon as I get my period. At one of my lowest points, a podcast that I follow named Ladies We Need to Talk released an episode about perimenopause and mental health. Listening to other women’s experiences, I sobbed and sobbed – not out of sadness but out of relief and validation.
This spurred me into action again. I researched all I could about perimenopause, mapped out all of my symptoms over the past four years, and even started keeping a food/exercise diary. I then printed a physical copy of this, and with it in my hands, went back to my doctor to demand some help – in the form of HRT.
My doctor suggested I go back on the pill, which I refused. She then suggested anti-depressants, which I strongly refused. It has taken a level of determination and strength to push for what I think and know I need for my body – it’s taken me advocating for myself, which is infuriating but empowering at the same time.
I am now a couple of months into using HRT, in the form of estrogen gel and progesterone tablets. It’s early days, but I'm already feeling a positive effect on my mood, confidence, and relief from other physical symptoms.
Here are some of my recommendations that might help you on your journey:
Podcasts:
Ladies we Need To Talk – episode “The Hot Truth About Perimenopause and Mental Health” (8th August 2024)
The Imperfects – episode “Dr Louise Newson – Maybe it’s Menopause” (S5 E43 13 November 2023)
The Dr Louise Newson Podcast
Dear Menopause
Book:
The New Menopause by Dr Mary Claire Haver
Follow on Insta:
@menopause_doctor (Dr Louise Newson)
@drmaryclaire (Mary Claire Haver, MD)
Website:
Australasian Menopause Society – recommended doctor/specialist list (registered with the AMS)
In the coming months GLO will be launching an initiative called Be Your Own Project. If you have any recommendations or resources, you think women will benefit from let us know at hello@glonetwork.com.au.
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